Us ranch girls like to knock off the mud and scrape off the cow poop, at least once in awhile. I envy the cows in this regard. All they have to do is smooth their cow licks down on a nearby tree, building, my leg, another cow or whatever is handy, and then have a herd mate lick their face. Their daily prep only takes a couple minutes and they are good to start their day, which consists of eating, socializing, and eating some more — much like my days!
My hair doesn’t always come out of a full night’s sleep well-coiffed, and sometimes I stagger out the door in the wee hours of the morning to toss the cows some hay in my yoga pants and slippers, and they give me that look like,
“Girlfriend, where’s your pride? Can’t you at least rub your head on a fence post and have someone lick your face?”
I usually do take a little more time to fix my face and comb my hair for the special going to town days to get salt blocks and supplies, but my daily routine is pretty simple and pretty quick too. Here are five of my favorite items for getting my face licked into shape for the day.
No. 1— I start with a good scrubbing. I wash my face with Dr. Woods Black Soap with organic shea butter. I love that it makes my skin feel not only clean but smooth and blemish free. It also doesn’t leave a greasy film and it is not drying. As Goldilocks from Three Bears fame would say, it’s “just right.” And it’s economical as it only takes a squirt about the size of quarter for a thorough washing.
No. 2— To get my face squeaky clean and give it a gentle exfoliation (much gentler than a cow’s tongue), I use the Spacell Stimulite® Facial Sponge. Paired with the Dr. Woods soap,
it gives me a nice, clean ranch girl look. I came across this sponge after I dropped a face brush on the hard tile shower floor and it shattered. I have never been a big fan of sponges due to the possibility of mold and other contaminants building up, but this antibacterial sponge is the bomb! I don’t think there is any way I can break this sponge and it looks as new and clean as the day I bought it 6 months ago.
O.K., now that I’ve dusted off the dirt a little, it’s time for some moisturizer. I have used tons of brand name products (i.e. expensive) in an effort to retain my youthful appearance (I think I used to have a youthful appearance – I can’t really remember…). If I had all of the money back that I have spent on face moisturizers and serums over the years, I…well… let’s just say we might have been looking at buying a new tractor this year. Not quite that bad, but you get the idea…
Anyway, outside of plastic surgery, the wrinkles are going to come regardless of all of the goop I put on my face, but I’m hoping that if I keep my face out of the sun as much as possible and I don’t smoke, I might not get as many. At least that is the advice I follow, but there’s not much I can do about gravity. I guess I could stand on my head, but then I suspect I would just have wrinkles that creased up, instead of down. Or I could never smile, frown, smirk or narrow my eyes, but there’s not much fun in that.
That’s another area where the cows have it good. You can’t see their wrinkles because they are covered with hair, and it’s really hard to tell their age without looking at their teeth.
And if a cow doesn’t want you to look at her teeth, it ain’t gonna happen!
No. 3 — Nevertheless, inevitable or not, it’s a woman’s civic duty to keep trying to minimize the visual effects of aging, besides we have a country to support — if we didn’t buy all the beauty and skin products, the whole economy would collapse! So without further ado, here is my favorite daytime moisturizer:Andalou Naturals Probiotic + C Renewal Cream.
I love that it is light and doesn’t go on greasy. My skin sucks it up like a parched desert in a matter of seconds. I have combination skin (part dry and part oily) and it seems to even out everything to just the right, non-shiny, but moisturized look. It comes in a little jar, 1.7 oz., but it just takes a small amount to cover my entire face, so will usually last me a couple of months.
The box says it’s also “brightening.” I’m not sure what that means in a lotion or if it does anything, but just smelling this lotion brightens my day! It’s kind of like starting my morning walking through an orange grove where someone is baking sugar cookies. Usually I don’t like the smell of lotions and opt for the unscented ones, but I love the smell of all of the Andalou products I have tried. However, the smell dissipates quickly, so once in awhile I find myself sniffing the jar to get another hit of that heavenly aroma — seriously, it smells that good!
No. 4 — I don’t wear makeup in the form of foundation or concealer on an every day basis. Party because there is usually not enough time in the mornings and partly because I rebel at having to “get prettied up.” Men don’t have to get prettied up – they just put on some clothes (usually yesterday’s), grab a hat and walk out the door.
But I do envy the cows and their long, fluttery eyelashes, so even though I’m not much for makeup, I try to give my peeper covers a little boost
with Real Purity Mascara. I’m a hands-on person when it comes to my eyes — I’m always rubbing them or trying to dig a piece of hay dust or dirt out of them — so with most mascaras I end up looking like a raccoon after a few minutes. Not so with Real Purity Mascara. I can swipe a wind-induced tear from my eyes with the back of my hand and not worry about getting the dreaded black smudge. I might end up smearing something else on my face, but not my mascara!
Most of all, I like that Real Purity products are all natural. The mascara just has the following ingredients: purified aqua (water), cera alba (beeswax), kosher vegetable glycerin (palm), euphorbia cerifera (candellila) wax, and iron oxide. That’s it – nothing that I can’t pronounce and most of it I have heard of before. It has become important to me to avoid as many chemicals as I can and this is just one product I use to accomplish that.
So, all of that takes about five minutes, which is about all of the time I have before the rancher starts wondering where his breakfast is. I think he is much more interested in his bacon and eggs than whether or not my eyelashes are noticeable.
I’m definitely not what you would call high maintenance — a little recalcitrant at times according to the hubby — but not high maintenance.
N0. 5 — My daily ritual wouldn’t be complete without at least brushing my hair, and I am particular about that as I am one of those people who could be referred to as a “tender ninny” when it comes to my head. Most store-bought hairbrushes are too stiff for me and scratch my scalp and my biggest dislike — perhaps in the whole world — is getting my hair pulled. I can still remember my mother trying to comb my hair when I was a child, and even though she was extremely careful, I squealed like a cat when it gets its tail stepped on every time she even approached me with a comb. On top of that I always wanted my hair long, which made things worse when it came time to comb out the gnarls. Mom was a real trooper though and let me have it long anyway, even if it did take lots of time and patience for her to keep it looking nice for me.
So, now that I can’t convince my mom to come out to the ranch and comb my hair every day, I have my favorite brush the Morrocco Method Pure Boar Bristle Brush that I use at least every morning and sometimes two or three times a day if it’s windy or snowing or a cow slobbered on me. It’s designed for people with “sensitive scalps,” but they do have models for those of you who can take the rough stuff!
That’s it! My five favorite items for getting ready to greet the day, and the cows. I have come to realize that the cows don’t care how I look as long as I throw them a flake of hay and give them an occasional scratch on the back (the one’s that will let me anyway). They could care less if my hair is a mess and my eyelashes are short, but I feel like I need to keep up appearances at least a little bit in case someone drops by, and these are the items that help me get ‘er done!